Susan Jeffers

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A 'Feel the Fear' Story

My Best Friend

It was 1989 when at the age of 29 and the mother of three little children that I was facing divorce. Fear was paralyzing me and had drowned me in a severe depression. Then in the post one morning I received a gift from my beloved sister, Jeltje. It was a book entitled Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway.  Inside my sister had written, ''I love you, you can do it!''

I read it, felt it, did it, and within no time I found a lovely new house for me and my three kids, which we decorated with the help of loving friends. This book became my best friend; it was next to my bed in loving company with You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay.  I started studying psychology at the Open University and found a volunteer job at a woman’s health centre.

Then came my next challenge as my ex-husband and I decided to give our marriage another try...and again fear took hold of me.  I worked through the book again and felt the fear and did it anyway.  We moved abroad for my partner's work...felt the fear and did it anyway...I applied for a job I wasn't trained for...felt the fear did it anyway. After five years I was starting to feel unhappy once more, but I was scared to quit my job.  Mmmmmm it becomes boring maybe to say this, but I read the book again and was empowered to feel the fear and do it anyway. I got a part-time job and applied for a very expensive educational course to become a therapist, for which I did not have the necessary degrees.  I felt the fear went for it anyway. And I got in!!! 

At one point during the course we were asked to give a lecture to our fellow students about dysfunctional communication...and guess what I used...feel the fear and do it anyway to explain that most dysfunctional communication begins in our own heads. It was fun for most of my co-students, who then became hungry to read the book themselves.

After my studies I decided to start my own consultancy business.  And again this was another step into the unknown requiring all the tools from Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway.  The business subsequently failed, but I survived and was hired as a therapist in the town where I now live. I love my work...and you can guess the title of the book I recommend every one of my clients to read, and of course they love the book.

Life’s dramas keep happening.  My husband lost his job recently, our cash flow went from pretty good to nil, and the fears began all over again.  We could lose our house and, at the age of 50, it isn't easy to start a new life.... but guess what...we're feeling the fear and doing it anyway!!!  We know from our previous experiences that something good will come out of whatever life hands us.

I thank you Susan for your brilliant book, which is written with so much love. And you.\'re a great example for me in my work.  And your book is still my best friend.

Karin, Antwerp, Belgium