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A 'Feel the Fear' Story

Turning points in my life

I grew up in a country in Eastern Europe. My parents were both university graduates so that provided me with a certain degree of openness to the world and access to some information. But I wanted to expand my world.

In school, I did my best to obtain good marks and believed that was all I needed to do to improve. But, the way we were being taught did not feel quite right for me anymore. Questions popped into my head and started to bother me, especially those related to the way I was supposed to live my life and about finding my true calling. In school, at work and elsewhere people would turn away from original thinking.

So I figured there must be another way of doing things and feeling good about myself at the same time. This is how my journey of self-exploration started. Initially, I looked in books for answers, but that didn't take me far as there was no access to this kind of information provided in my country. I tried the Internet, but getting access to the Internet was a challenge in itself. I didn't have a computer and buying one was not something on my parents' priority list. I tried to get access at school, without success, as the lines were never open for students. I knew I had to do something about it.

This was the first turning point in my life. I decided to go ahead and do whatever I was supposed to do to go to university and become an engineer. The engineering degree would provide me with a safe income, a better chance of obtaining a job in a city and the means to look for what I wanted most in my life, to break free from the constraints of my existing life. I had this strong idea in my head that there must be more to life than just becoming somebody who follows rules in a society that seems to have lost its core values. I did everything that was expected from me, got a reasonably paid job, got married, settled down, had a wonderful daughter, but something was still missing and that call was still growing strongly inside me. So I looked around and switched jobs a few times in an attempt to find my place. It just wasn't there, and I started wondering if I was the problem.

One day at work, I met this Irish marketing consultant, Charley, who took the time and explained a few things to me about personal development and the way you can learn how to take control of your own life. I listened to her carefully and shortly we became best friends. Even though we came from two different worlds, we connected as if we knew each other for ever. It took some time for me to absorb all this new information and overcome my fears, but I could feel how I was changing a little bit every day.

Then something else happened. During one of my business trips to Dublin, Charley bought me this book, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, and insisted I read it. I doubted my English was good enough to be able to understand it so the book sat on my bed side cupboard for a while. One evening I decided to give it a go. The more I read, the more I felt it was for me. I forgot about my initial fears and I completely sunk myself in the teaching in the book. It was an eye opener. From time to time I was jumping up and down crying out loud ,''Yes, Yes!'' in the bathroom mirror, as I felt so connected to what Susan had to say, as if she was talking straight to my heart and resonating with it. It felt like she knew exactly what had been troubling me for so long. That book was the major turning point in my life.

I hungrily bought and read everything written by Susan Jeffers I could find, one after the other. The revelation was awesome. For instance, just knowing that it was my ''chatterbox'' that so often kept me from doing what I really wanted to do. I felt so happy my heart could explode.

During my next trip to Ireland, it happened that Susan Jeffers held a workshop in Dublin and I couldn't wait to go and see her ''live''. When she arrived at the seminar, my heart beats accelerated. She was there in flesh and blood, tiny, but so powerful. Her eyes were sparkling and her voice was so calm and loving. During the break I went and introduced myself to Susan. I told her that I loved all her books. She was so open and happy to meet me. That day was special for me.

Soon after that I had to return to my country... Nothing had really changed to make my life any better and that didn't suit me any longer. I wanted more. I knew I could make a better life for myself and my daughter. So one day when I was feeling low and lonely, I did something unexpected. I wrote an email to Susan and I told her about my life and my goals. I was so frightened. What was I thinking? Why would anybody as successful and busy as Susan take the time and actually read my story? Well, I felt the fear and I did it anyway, even I wasn't expecting anything in return. I was just happy I did it.

To my surprise, Susan Jeffers actually took the time, read my email and even replied to me. She was so caring and supportive in her reply that tears of happiness rolled down my face as I read what she had to say. I had one more reason to believe that I could really turn my life around if I really wanted to.

A year ago I finally emigrated to Sydney, Australia, with my second and wonderful Aussie husband and my daughter, who have always been there for me along the way, and I fulfilled my dream of living a life I chose to live, in a free country, where everything is possible when you put your mind to it.

I started writing short stories about people overcoming obstacles in their lives and two of them have been published by EzineArticles.com. This was something I always wanted to do, and it is so rewarding that it motivates me to continue helping others to overcome the challenges in their own lives.

And, all of this happened because somebody out there cared so much about other people that she wrote so many wonderful books, took the time to read somebody's story and then connected with her.

Thank you, Susan, for that was exactly what I needed, to allow myself to grow.

Cornelia, New South Wales, Australia